It's 0230 in the middle of the night where thoughts run wild and won't come back. Where the sleep monster abandoned me and left me wide awake to an array of living nightmares. Where there is no refuge and I am raw to this emotion.

No, my life hadn't walked out of a drama series, but it thought that things might be spiced up a little by producing a carbon-copy. It's entertaining when you get to sit in front of the black box but helpless when you are forced to star in it. There is no director in the show of life; you can only continue acting. Flail your arms and scream, there is no cut and retake.

What hurts is the fear that comes with it; but there's no way I'm gonna take the second option.

We all have to be strong but

Even heroes have the right to bleed;

what's more,
it's only me.


Work hard, play hard; so that I don't have time to stop and think, just so I can be numb to all this pain.

it matters not who I am but who I want to be.

till next time.